Additional Questions & Responses From Our Most Recent Sermon Series
This past Sunday we concluded a sermon series addressing what the scriptures have to say to a sexually broken and confused world (I can feel some of you blushing across the screen). And as if that wasn't nerve-racking enough, we ended it by taking all three services to field questions that were submitted to our website throughout the course of the series and others that were texted in live. No this was not my attempt at shock-value preaching and I also don't claim to have an above average wealth of knowledge when it comes to sex and sexuality. This series came with no hidden agenda but rather the same goal we seek to accomplish every week: to teach what the Bible says and to equip people to live a life that honors, reflects, and points to Jesus.
THE WORD
"After three days they found Him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions." - Luke 2:46
Jesus' ministry was marked by questions. Not only was He constantly fielding questions from the crowds around Him but He spent most of His time asking a lot of them too (mostly to get His point across). Even as a 12-year-old boy we see Him in the temple asking questions to the religious leaders of His day.
It's not difficult to understand why the Church by-and-large has not built systems for people to express their questions. If we're being honest, it's intimidating to be posed with difficult theological and doctrinal inquiries. But I believe in our avoidance of the hard conversations we have become limited in our knowledge as spiritual leaders and disciples of Christ. I grew more in my Biblical knowledge by regularly accepting questions from teenagers in just a few years of youth ministry than I did in the previous 22 years of growing up in the Church. Difficult questions forced me to wrestle with the scriptures.
But before I jump into some more questions, I want to remind you what I often remind our people. First, I don't have all the answers and I will get things wrong. That's why I don't call this Q & A but rather Q & R, questions and responses. I may not be able to give you an answer but I can give you a response and share with you where my current understanding is on these issues. Second, the word QUEST is in the word question, so if you are genuinely seeking answers, it may take going on a journey for you to eventually arrive at them.
If you want to see all the questions and responses we navigated on Sunday, you can find them here.
Below are some responses to additional questions that we either received or often hear that we weren't able to get to this past Sunday.
1. How do you navigate difficult seasons in marriage, such as life-changing events, medical emergencies, etc?
Where I am able to I really try to defer these types of questions to those who are older than me who have been married much longer. This year Jill and I will celebrate 12 years of marriage. I don't belittle that, it's something to celebrate! However, I recognize there is a wealth of wisdom in seasoned saints who have walked through marriage for decades and who have raised and released children into the world.
That being said, we have been through our share of difficult seasons. One of the ways we have approached those times of difficulty has been to be very intentional in feeding ourselves testimonies. Sometimes we just need to know that others have made it through what we're going through.
Revelation 19:10 says "...the testimony of Jesus IS the spirit of prophecy." In other words, what He does for someone else, He can do for you and me. There's a famous quote that says, “Man can live about forty days without food, about three days without water, about eight minutes without air...but only for one second without hope.”
A hopeless marriage is a Godless one. God, by nature, is the presence of HOPE. Wherever He is things can change and you can endure.
How do you reconcile the emphasis on sexual purity and abstinence before marriage with the reality that many individuals, including Christians, engage in premarital sex? Additionally, how do you address the potential harm caused by promoting an ideal of sexual purity that may lead to feelings of shame, guilt, and judgment among those who do not adhere to it?
This question speaks to the tension every God-fearing preacher, leader, and disciple should be wrestling with every time we share the gospel. The gospel is the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ and it literally means "good news." But this good news begins with bad news, and the bad news is that everyone has sin.
Romans 3 says "We ALL have sinned and fall short." The good news of the cross is in response to the bad news of our sin. It's not the gospel that brings shame, it's sin that does. Romans 6 says that "the WAGES of sin is death..." So, if we avoid giving people the bad news, they will have no need for the good news. Preaching the scripture is not judgement, it's warning of the coming judgement.
Is there potential harm in promoting sexual purity? Sure, there can be, paritcularly where there is legalism and condemnation at work, but I would argue there is far more harm in not preaching it. This is why we need more than just a talk or a sermon or a class. We need an ongoing discussion and we need to do life together in relationship with one another, so we can give grace to each other as we fall short on our journey.
But I stand firm on preaching what Jesus preached and living in the tension of grace and truth as we do.
Is the word “homosexual” mistranslated in the Bible?
I actually started getting this question a lot in the last few years I taught high school. I firmly believe it's a direct result of what I like to call "TIKTOK THEOLOGY." This kind of content often originates on social media platforms like Instagram and TikTok where people attempt to overthrow centuries of orthodox doctrine and theology in a 30 second video clip. Yes, it's as ridiculous as it sounds. And it's amazing to me how quickly people will believe what comes across the screens of their phones simply because it justifies their sin.
2 Timothy 4 says "... the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear." Itching ears simply want to be scratched, but what do the doctors tell us about scratching an itch? DON'T DO IT! In many cases because it causes you to itch more and it will often even spread.
An itch doesn't need to be scratched, it needs to be soothed. That's why the Bible refers to the WASHING of the Word. Don't settle for teaching that scratches but doesn't soothe.
The claim is that the word "homosexual" in the Bible is actually referring to men having sex with children and not in any way prohibiting consensual, adult, same-sex relationships. Let me be clear, this is simply not true. And most every Biblical scholar, theologian, and teacher agrees on this.
"Homosexual" is a fairly modern word that wasn't used much until the late 19th and early 20th centuries. But where we see the word homosexual in the Bible it is most often referring to behavior; in other words homosexual acts. It is even often translated as "men who have sex with men." It's not referring to attraction or temptation, it's referring to action, it's what you do with what you feel that makes it sin (and yes lust is a sin).
There are 6 fairly common passages (3 in the old testament, and 3 in the new) that explicitly condemn homosexual behavior as sin, not to mention all the other passages that teach traditional and heterosexual marriage as God's design.
But Romans 1 is by far the most descriptive on the subject, and it doesn't even use the word "homosexual" rather it simply describes the sin. Romans 1 even seems to indicate that homosexuality is the result of a society rejecting God and turning their hearts from Him. The Bible is written to a corporate audience way more than it is to an individual, so it's easy to read that and think that if you reject God and turn to idolatry, you might develop an attraction to the same sex, but that's not what it's saying.
When a society rejects the ways of God and rejects the work of His hands, worshiping the work of their own, the result is pride, selfishness, and in many cultures throughout history it has also been perversion.
I'm not going to throw off on TikTok and tell you to stop wasting your time on there, but at the very least I would encourage you to not rely on it for your doctrine and theology.
**Keep in mind this is in response to a specific question, so don't hold this response as my final word on all things homosexuality. I encourage you to refer to this message for a more thorough overview of how I navigate this issue as a whole.
How do we address same sex relationships and gender identity with our kids
Phew, I'm going to be honest I don't really know. Our kids are still very young. We have not had to address this with them yet because they haven't been exposed to it. They are 5 and 3. We filter everything they watch and they know there are some things they cannot watch because they dishonor God, therefore it's not for us.
I'm not going to have a great answer for you but I would just say first, you are the gatekeeper of your home so know what they're watching and being exposed to. Don't trust it just because it's a kids show. I can't tell you how many shows out there have characters with two mommies, or an episode about someone who changes genders, etc.
Matthew 18:6 says “If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea." There is a severe punishment awaiting those who seek to pervert and distort a child's view of what God created.
When it comes to media, in our student ministry we always taught students to:
Discover the message - what is being taught in the show or the song? Everything has a message, so what is it?
Discern if it lines up with the Word - does scripture agree, disagree?
Decide if it should be in your heart - if it shouldn't, it shouldn't be in your head, on your screen, or in your ears either.
*When they're young we have to teach them WHAT to think, but as they get older we must teach them HOW to think so they can think for themselves.
I am aware, however that this doesn't protect them from the bombardment of this issue coming to them in school, through friends, and practically every direction you face. So I would just say I think the most important thing is knowing what you believe on these issues and knowing what the scriptures say so that there is no wavering in your own heart when it comes to these conversations. Open, intentional conversations are our responsibility as parents. Hear me, you are anointed to parent in this hour and at this time. Holy Spirit is your partner and He will guide you in how to navigate these important discussions with your kids! Don't avoid them, lean into them. Your silence on these issues will speak louder than your humility to discuss them, mistakes and all.
What about hermaphrodites?
Let me just say outright, I almost failed biology in high school, so, consider my response through that lens. One of the buzz words of the day is "intersex" which refers to people born with both sex organs. This is a very rare phenomenon but it actually happens. So, what do we do with that? We love them! And we acknowledge they exist! But I don't believe we upend the foundations of society, redefine pronouns, and invent genders because of a disorder that a few people are born with.
I want to be careful not to assume too much about the question but given my poor performance in ninth grade biology and the fact that this was posed during a series addressing sexuality, I can only surmise that "What about hermaphrodites?" is asking how does the existence of such people impact the current culture war on gender?
In many ways I feel a deep compassion for these people because they have been propped up as the poster-children of the trans-movement, much in the same way that women who have been sexually abused have been used by the pro-abortion movement. People will often bring up hermaphrodites as a way to justify gender-surgeries and the existence of "non-binary" people, claiming that not everyone is male or female. But hermaphrodites are not a third gender; this is simply a medical deformity, and thank the Lord for treatments and surgeries that are able to aid those who are born this way.
At the risk of rambling or maybe just answering a question no one is asking, when I think about the current discussion our culture is having about gender and sexuality my mind goes to Matthew 19. In this chapter Jesus is addressing questions on divorce and He ends by saying this in v. 12, "For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.”
Eunuchs were household male slaves who had been castrated, that is, they had their male-genitalia removed. The reason being that if they were serving in the house, their master didn't want to chance them having sex with any of the women, so they simply emasculated them (I thank the Lord every day that I live in the 21st century). Now what do Eunuchs have to do with the modern-day LGBTQIA+ movement?
Allow me to attempt to draw some parallels.
Jesus gives us three categories of eunuchs:
Those BORN that way - In this case, much like hermaphrodites, born with a biological complication. We live in a fallen world with disease and disorder.
Those MADE that way - I feel most sympathetic for children who's parents are allowing them to make life-changing decisions at 12 years old by opting for surgeries or puberty blockers. While I think the numbers on how much this is actually happening are probably a little inflated, it's heartbreaking to think that any parent would support this.
Those who choose LIVE that way - Now here's the twist: as we parallel this with the trans movement, this third group is NOT referring to people who "choose" to live as the opposite gender but rather people who choose to live in opposition to their feelings and desires. The apostle Paul lived a celibate lifestyle for the sake of the Kingdom and even encouraged believers around the world to do this same in 1 Corinthians 7. He "lived as a Eunuch" despite having the physical ability to procreate and enjoy the pleasures of sex. Jesus is teaching a hard truth here, that no matter how strongly you feel or desire to do what is contrary to God's Word and His design, you and I are called to live out His truth, and not become consumed with our own, which is no real truth at all.
I know this might be hard to believe but to my knowledge no one has ever died by not having sex. I have compassion for all people, no matter their condition or their sin. We have had transgender people attend our church before, I pray we have more in the future. We want to love them and share Jesus with them. But I will not participate in the deception of the world. This may be a horrible answer to a very open-ended question but that's probably about the best I can do.
CONCLUSION
The Church must be a place where questions are encouraged and embraced. If people can't come to the Church or to the Bible with questions, they won't come to the Church or the Bible for answers. The Psalms are FULL of questions, most of which came from David, who was considered "a man after God's own heart." Perhaps it was by actually questions that he, in fact, pursued the heart of God. Feel free to send in any questions you may be wrestling with pertaining to the Word, life, God or anything else. As much as I feel very ill-equipped to give answers, I know questions are ultimately what make me go searching for them. Let's keep searching together.
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